Why not the UN to regulate the Internet?

The US House of Representatives is debating a proposal to give the ITU more control over the Internet. This organisation, the UN agency for information and communication technologies, is so important to the operation of telecomms and the Internet that I'd never heard about it until now.

Apparently, this transfer of control is a good idea: lots of major countries agree.

The proposal is backed by China, Russia, Brazil, India and other UN members, and would give the UN’s International Telecommunication Union (ITU) more control over the governance of the Internet.

Let me repeat, that's China ("Great Firewall of"), Russia ("Spam and Internet Crime Central"), Brazil ("Internet connectivity provided by 2000 miles of wet string") and India ("pre-screen content to stop people saying bad things about anyone who matters"). Well, I don't know about you, but I'm convinced.

I browsed the ITU site, and five minutes of reading the Newsroom articles had me wanting to pound a wooden stake through their skulls. They don't actually do anything that anyone cares about! I'd be the first to admit that ICANN has its problems, but compared to this alternative they're a combination of Bruce Willis and Mahatma Gandhi.